{"id":164183,"date":"2016-11-30T07:36:09","date_gmt":"2016-11-30T14:36:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shockya.com\/news\/?p=164183"},"modified":"2016-11-30T07:36:09","modified_gmt":"2016-11-30T14:36:09","slug":"the-brand-new-testament-movie-review","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shockya.com\/news\/2016\/11\/30\/the-brand-new-testament-movie-review\/","title":{"rendered":"The Brand New Testament Movie Review"},"content":{"rendered":"

THE BRAND NEW TESTAMENT<\/a><\/strong>
\nMusic Box Films<\/strong>
\nReviewed by: Harvey Karten, Shockya<\/strong>
\nGrade: B<\/strong>
\nDirector:\u00a0 Jaco Van Dormael<\/a><\/strong>
\nWritten by: Jaco Van Dormael, Thomas Gunzig<\/strong>
\nCast: Pili Groyne, Beno\u00eet Poelvoorde, Yolande Moreau, Catherine Deneuve<\/strong>
\nScreened at: Review 2, NYC, 11\/21\/16<\/strong>
\nOpens: December 9, 2016<\/strong><\/p>\n

Donald Trump called Brussels \u201ca hell-hole,\u201d so how could God possibly reside there?\u00a0 Easy.\u00a0 In the creative minds of director and co-writer Jaco Van Dormael and of co-scripter Thomas Gunzig, God may well reside in such a place as he is not a nice fella, but a jerk.\u00a0 He is so bored (can\u2019t blame him after having lived longer than today\u2019s Okinawans) he dreams up ways to annoy humankind.\u00a0 He taps out laws on his computer such as \u201cthe bread always falls on the side with the jam\u201d and sets up a plane crash set to kill scores of people on the beach.\u00a0 He also does nicer things like conjuring giraffes to walk down the Brussels streets and a tiger who watches static on an old TV.\u00a0 God is played by Beno\u00eet Poelvoorde, but before going any further, wouldn\u2019t this sort of surreal satire be considered sacrilegious and unwatchable by religious Americans?\u00a0 I would have thought so, but after noting that 80% of Evangelicals recently voted for a presidential candidate that thinks John McCain is a coward, that a Mexican-American judge cannot be trusted, that undocumented Hispanics should be deported by the vanload leaving their born-in-America children orphans, that torture should be revived and that a prominent TV journalist has blood \u201ccoming from wherever,\u201d this film should be considered practically Dr. Seuss.<\/p>\n

The heroes of the movie, the ones who can save humankind, are both women.\u00a0 Ea (Pili Groyne\u2014who is Marion Cotillard\u2019s daughter) and\u00a0 God\u2019s wife (Yolande Moreau), both rebel in their own ways.\u00a0 God\u2019s wife, who is repressed by her husband and spends the days in embroidery and a baseball card collection will come out of her shell near the conclusion.\u00a0 Ea, who hates her father, plans to get back at him in her own passive-aggressive ways.\u00a0 She knows that her brother, Jesus Christ (David Murgia) limited his disciples to 12, so Ea seeks to increase the number to 18, which is the number on two baseball teams, thereby favoring her mother.\u00a0 As she chooses these disciples, she has a local bum write a Brand New Testament as she dictates.\u00a0 Best of all, she emails everyone on earth with his or her date of death, thereby undercutting God, who\u00a0 left this a mystery and thereby compels people to lead carefully repressed lives.<\/p>\n

Yet some people choose to make no changes to the ways they live.\u00a0 Exceptions include a young guy who lucks out with a high number, thereby taking risks like jumping out of planes without a parachute, since he cannot die for decades no matter what he does.\u00a0 Ea meanders around, succeeding to add six disciples.\u00a0 Each time, a character is added to a painting of The Last Supper on one of God\u2019s walls, each time inspected with curiosity by God\u2019s wife.\u00a0 The fizziest comic touch finds Martine (Catherine Deneuve) pairing off with a gorilla and seen in a post-coital embrace (this after paying a stud to service her in a send-up of her role as hooker S\u00e9verine Serizy in \u201cBelle du Jour.\u201d)<\/p>\n

By the time you hear of the unorthodox couplings of the other disciples, you will not think anything unusual if a fish skeleton sings \u201cLa Mer\u201d while seeking a return to water.\u00a0 Nor might you consider a breach of logic if Ea walks on water but God sinks like a bag of cement.\u00a0 You may be hoping that the writers would push further in satirizing the human and celestial condition, but the movie was made before the recent presidential campaign.\u00a0 A sequel perhaps?<\/p>\n

Unrated.\u00a0 116 minutes.\u00a0 \u00a9 Harvey Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online<\/strong><\/p>\n

Story \u2013 B<\/strong>
\nActing \u2013 B<\/strong>
\nTechnical \u2013 B+<\/strong>
\nOverall – B<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"test\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

THE BRAND NEW TESTAMENT Music Box Films Reviewed by: Harvey Karten, Shockya Grade: B Director:\u00a0 Jaco Van Dormael Written by: Jaco Van Dormael, Thomas Gunzig Cast: Pili Groyne, Beno\u00eet Poelvoorde, Yolande Moreau, Catherine Deneuve Screened at: Review 2, NYC, 11\/21\/16 Opens: December 9, 2016 Donald Trump called Brussels \u201ca hell-hole,\u201d so how could God possibly […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":37,"featured_media":164343,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"apple_news_api_created_at":"","apple_news_api_id":"","apple_news_api_modified_at":"","apple_news_api_revision":"","apple_news_api_share_url":"","apple_news_cover_media_provider":"image","apple_news_coverimage":0,"apple_news_coverimage_caption":"","apple_news_cover_video_id":0,"apple_news_cover_video_url":"","apple_news_cover_embedwebvideo_url":"","apple_news_is_hidden":"","apple_news_is_paid":"","apple_news_is_preview":"","apple_news_is_sponsored":"","apple_news_maturity_rating":"","apple_news_metadata":"\"\"","apple_news_pullquote":"","apple_news_pullquote_position":"","apple_news_slug":"","apple_news_sections":[],"apple_news_suppress_video_url":false,"apple_news_use_image_component":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[8,4],"tags":[16592,16810,17284,38576],"class_list":["post-164183","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-movies","category-reviews","tag-bible","tag-religion","tag-surrealism","tag-the-brand-new-testament"],"apple_news_notices":[],"yoast_head":"\nThe 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