Title: Vampires Suck
Directed by: Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer
Starring: Matt Lanter (Tinker Bell: A Winter Story, 90210), Ken Jeong (The Hangover 2, Transformers 3), Anneliese van der Pol, Jenn Proske and Chris Riggi
What do you get when you mix comedian Ken Jeong with a vampire-werewolf-human girl love triangle? Not another vampire thrown in the mix with the countless covens in the enormously popular ‘Twilight Saga’ franchise, but instead a surprisingly, truly funny parody movie titled ‘Vampires Suck,’ from two of the writers of the original ‘Scary Movie.’
Leading up to the release of ‘Vampires Suck,’ written and directed by spoof filmmaking duo Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, the new 20th Century Fox satire seemed as though it would easily follow in the lead of its parody predecessors. The two have made a name for themselves by releasing several negatively received satires throughout the first decade of the 2000s, including ‘Date Movie,’ ‘Epic Movie,’ ‘Meet the Spartans’ and ‘Disaster Movie.’
But ‘Vampires Suck’ was surprisingly different from the duo’s previous efforts, which were deservingly named some of the worst movies of the decade. Previously, Friedberg and Seltzer mainly hired little-known actors who didn’t convey much emotion, and they wrote scripts that focused more so on making fun of the hottest movies of the moment than telling an actual story.
While ‘Vampires Suck’ certainly won’t be winning any awards this year for best script, it does have a slightly more cohesive plot-line than Friedberg and Seltzer’s previous films. The two made the right decision to cut down the number of movies it would spoof to mainly focus on ‘Twilight’ and ‘The Twilight Saga: New Moon.’ Instead of creating a multitude of characters and taking plot-lines from several different movies to piece their lives together, ‘Vampires Suck’ actually had somewhat of an in-depth back-story.
The movie follows Becca Crane (portrayed by Jenn Proske), who moves to Sporks, Washington to live with her father, Frank (played by Diedrich Bader), the sheriff of the city. At her new school, Becca meets Edward Sullen (portrayed by Matt Lanter) and the rest of his vampire family.
Edward first wants to stay away from Becca to protect her, since his family wants to drink her blood. She starts hanging out with her werewolf friend Jacob White (played by Christopher N. Riggi), who wants to date her. But Becca goes after Edward when he wants to reveal himself in the sunlight and die, thinking she died in a motorcycle accident.
Despite being her first leading movie role since graduating from Boston University last year with a BFA in Acting/Theatre Arts, Proske actually shone in every scene, rivaling her more experienced lead actor, Lanter. She nailed all of Kristen Stewart’s mannerisms from ‘Twilight’ and ‘New Moon,’ without portraying the character as completely helpless or lost without Edward. But Lanter was still a great choice for Edward, as he was made up to look exactly like Robert Pattinson. Plus, after starring as the lead, Will, in ‘Disaster Movie,’ he had experience bringing laughs and spoofs to more serious movies.
Jeong, whose most remembered for playing the villain Leslie Chow in the Golden Globe-winning Best Comedy Movie ‘The Hangover,’ also brought his infamous humor to the otherwise serious genre of vampirism. Jeong played Dario, the leader of the Zoltouri, the royalty family in the vampire world. Instead of dramatically playing the part, he showed vampires can have fun.
While people who haven’t seen or read ‘Twilight’ or ‘New Moon’ may not fully understand all of the jokes in ‘Vampires Suck,’ it’s definitely one of Friedberg and Seltzer’s better efforts. While twi-hards who saw the latest edition of the Twilight Saga, ‘Eclipse,’ one of the biggest movies of the summer, several times may not enjoy the jokes made at the franchise’s expense, people who want some mindless laughs will enjoy ‘Vampires Suck.’
Written by: Karen Benardello